Who do I turn too (Poem)

Quote of the day: if its to be, its up to me. John Dare.

Who do you turn too when you have burned every bridge,

Sharks in the water waiting to get their bloody revenge.

No life jacket, just a life that has been like jacking a man for everything he can stand

Two broken legs is what he get in the end

And ultimately, you was suppose to be my crutch, the one I leaned on and cared for so much

Now your a stranger too me, the epitome of the people you see on T.V.

Except there life’s make more sense, the drama they start is scripted and less intense

Who do I turn too when I have told you every thang, then you use it against me just to slander my name

I turn to me cause I am the best choice, no more of my secrets you will ever know but you will hear my voice.

I choose me!

 

 

Dealing with addiction

Sometimes its what you cant control that runs your life. John Dare

As serious as I want to be in this post, I also find some humor out of the content I am about to speak on because it is happening so rapidly. When you think about the word addiction, what is the first thing that comes to your mind? Drugs, alcohol, sex, porn, and gambling right? Ill get to those later! You also have addictions such as stealing and telling compulsive lies which may bring about such pleasures as the other addictions named above. Before we get to these topics, I want to talk about modern day addictions that does not deal with toxins or criminal mischief. This has affected way more addicts than all of the topics named above and that addiction is Social Media.

Since the launch of Facebook in 2006, the number of active members have reached 1.1 Billion as of January 2014. On average, people spend two to fifteen hours a day on Facebook; You do the math of how much time that equates to daily for one billion users. Facebook has found a unique way through a technology interface to incapacitate the drive of people by offering a virtual world where they can reach thousands of people and influence them in what ever way they are feeling at the time. Now why would this be qualified as an addiction? Think about it for a second. From a personal aspect, what kind of affects do addictions have on people? For one, it takes up valuable time from what ever goals and objectives you are trying to accomplish at the moment. It most likely is costing you more money than it is making you, like the old saying says, “time IS money. Which raises the question. How does Facebook make so much money from its everyday users? They secretly take your information, based off of your post  and sell it to marketers who then stamp advertisements on your page which offers products to keep you hooked or sell you a product. Since the successful launch of Facebook, hundreds of social media networks have sprung up in efforts to create mass audiences to compete with Facebook’s fan base. Social media has become the modern day addiction that will continue to grow and become its own language.

Pretty funny right! 

Well

Lets talk about some not so funny addictions…

I graduated high school in 2003 and over the course of years, I have seen people my age dying from drug overdose and sexually transmitted diseases. I have seen people who were once on top of “their” own world now walking the streets and selling their bodies just to make a living. I have played my part in providing a space for them to do the drugs and prostitution because I was most likely on some type of drug myself. My drug of choice was ecstasy, alcohol, and marijuana but I never let the drugs control me. I often took it in small doses when I participated and I promised myself if it got to the point where I was doing the things I seen being done, I would stop completely right away, And I did. The problem comes when you do decide to stop, but you are still in that same environment whether it is the neighborhood you live in, the friends you have made in this life style, or the ones you already have had for a period of time and they have so much to say about your life change. 

The truth of it all is, in order to be committed to change, you have to change what you are committed too. No matter what addictions you are experiencing, it has to be something within yourself that “wants” the change and will be committed to just that. If you have people around you that you share special connections with, and they still choose to live and alternative life style that may affect you changing, it will be vital for you to decide how to move forward with these people. Be prepared to deal with a sense of resentment, anger, and even rage from people who feel as if they are being abandoned or scrutinized. It is not an easy task but addictions can only replace lost voids temporarily. It is nothing to hide or be ashamed of. It is life and it is those experiences which builds character in us all.

 

 

You can fix what you can’t see

Love comes in an invisible form that can often be misinterpreted when used for the wrong reasons. John Dare

We live in such a magical world with so many fascinations and wonders that are waiting to be discovered every single day. But some may think that magic only exist in the fairy tales or the digital world because that is what are normal senses tell us.Some of the greatest authors in the world such as C.S. Lewis and Stephen King learned how to tap into this magical imaginative being, and has created some of the best projects of our time. Have you ever experienced that deja-vu moment when your brain tells you “I KNEW THAT WAS GOING TO HAPPEN”, or “I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT YOU AND NOW HERE YOU ARE! Wallah, magic. Now if you where to take this same concept and apply it to everyday living, how would this help you determine the magic of creating your own life through your thoughts and habits?

Your soul is the inner being that you cannot physically see, which guides your physical self in everyday living. Your thoughts comes from how you feel within your physical self, which creates and determine your life’s purpose. Stop for a second and think about where you are at this very moment. Look around you and take in everything. The smell, the sounds around you, the room that you are in, and then the environment outside the room you are in. Is this where you imagined you would be? How did you arrive their? Do you feel that you are a product of the environment or are you their because you want to be there? If you are somewhere by default, now is the time to take control of your life. 

One of the most important things you can do for your health and success in life is to gain control over your emotions. Your emotions is a basic guide that tells you how well or not so well you are doing in life. How many successful people have you heard of in the media that is bitter and upset because they have millions of dollars and can help the world be a better place. There are cases out there, but not too many. These people have learned to positively use the invisible magic around them to get where they want to in life. Does money always guarantee happiness or success, absolutely not. Everyone has a different measurement scale of what success is, and once you are successful in managing healthy emotional habits, you are ahead of the game 100 percent. Here are some 5 tips to gaining control over your emotions in a healthy way:

1. Know what you want out of life- There are too many people who live life on autopilot. You HAVE to set goals and you HAVE to stick to them. Working towards tangible goals will shift your thought pattern from negative to positive right away.

2. Surround yourself with positive people- Good and bad attitudes have the magical ability to rub off on you. Have you ever tried to be positive in a room full of negative people. Unless your the therapist, it just wont work. The negative attitudes will eventually rub off. Find the person with the biggest smile and get to know them.

3. Become a life long learner- Have you ever been on a college campus and felt the positive energy that the students displayed. That is because learning is fundamental. Be willing to learn new things and to challenge yourself to strive harder than the day before.

4. Take time out for yourself- This is the most important tip of them all. You are the most important person you know. You have to honor and love yourself with everything you have. By yourself something nice, work-out for 30 minutes, read a great book, or spend time with family and friends are all great activities to treat yourself.

5. Find a mentor- There is always someone out there who can relate to you and your situation. Having someone to talk to and bounce ideas off of is a healthy way to stay optimistic and positive about the future. 

You CAN fix what you cant see, it just starts with believing!

 

 

 

Enough is Enough

Inspired by many, intrigued by simplicity, empowered by truth, John Dare.

I am happy to publish my first blog as a part of the Be Heard Campaign. There may be a lot of unanswered questions when it comes to the beginning product of this project but the motivation behind it is simple and the end result is inevitable. Enough is enough. My enough and your enough may be different, but I am sure everyone has reached that point in their lives when they have simply had enough. 

I think it is most appropriate to give some background on myself and to narrow down some of the suspicions of what I have in store as far as content for the site. I currently reside in Florida and have been here for over 25 years. My father was in the military so we did quite a bit of traveling in my earlier years, even across seas. I graduated high school in 2003 and had made general manager for a local title company. I also enrolled into a local community college and soon found out I was not ready for the college life. Over the next ten years I had experienced many different aspects of life. I got first hand experience of what it was like living as an adult in a not so great neighborhood. In America, there are approximately 19,355 cities between the 50 states that make up our great land. And statistically, my hometown is the 5th city with the highest murder rates out of 19,000 cities. That really hits home when you think about who could be living right next door or even across the street from you. I experienced many different relationships and some where not so great. Some of the things that followed these experiences was drug use, sex addictions, procrastination, violence, emotional instability, and social destruction. Who is the person who loses themselves to themselves! Or the one who does not learn from thy mistakes. I would refer to them as a repeat offender to failure.    

One of the greatest experiences I have yet to experience is the death of my eldest brother, 37 at the time, in a attempted home invasion. As I mentioned earlier, living in a city with such a high murder rate does not mean anything to someone who has not experienced a tragic event first hand. Well let me rephrase that; we as humans have the ability to create a world around us that put blind spots in reality, just so our lives can be more comfortable at night. When the incident happened, I was in Atlanta getting ready to call it my new home and enroll into Morehouse University. Me and a few friends were on our way out to have a few drinks when I received the call that he had been shot twice in the stomach with a shot gun. Everything in that moment had left my body, My soul, my mind, my thoughts, my heart. I was so numb that I actually went out in 40 degree whether, no shirt, and laid on the side walk. It was really a relief because I could feel something again. At the time of the call he was still talking and functioning enough to describe two hooded guys tried to force him in the home. He would not let them in because my mother and his daughter was in the house. The cops where on the scene questioning him and anyone else that was around, but they would not let anyone near him. It took the ambulance 45 minutes to arrive and take him to the E.R. On October 18, 2011, 3:37 a.m. I received the last call from my mother telling me he had passed away. That was the saddest seven hours I had driven anywhere in my life as I headed back home to deal with it all. 

Just when I thought it could not get any worse, my mothers health was a wreck and she controlled her emotions through alcohol and violence. She had multiple heart problems including a pace maker, and was in no shape to deal with the death of her eldest child. My father also had multiple health issues but stays pretty active and eats correctly. He learned how to hide his sickness and make it appear that he was well when he really was not. And I, the aspired college student had gotten myself in the biggest rut yet to come. This particular night, I was having drinks with a friend, and upon him dropping me off, I woke up the next morning in jail with a D.U.I. When I woke up the next day strapped down to a bed, I was sure I had really gone and did it this time. Long story short, my life had become what I had wished for so long that it would not be, over complicated and under contributed. I had become the very person that I said I would never be and strive hard not to be. I felt like the ultimate loser. In 2012, I was sentenced to a year of probation and a fee of $3200 that needed to be paid within a years time, or else!! I had no job, I had no resources, but I did have one great friend who would not see me hurt anymore than I had too (Love you Ronda). She made she call the technical things where handled such as DUI classes, victim panels, etc. I on the other hand got to work right away looking for free therapy because I knew that was apart of probation and not for profits that I could volunteer at as a part of reducing my probation hours. I was a success. Not only did I gain hours, but I also gained experience in social services, business development, coaching, and community liaison services.

On January 06, 2014, I was released from probation with clean hands. It was time to get back in the game and start making a healthy living again. O there was just one thing; Over the last 3 years I had put in over 4,000 online applications (4,007 to be exact) and had only landed 5 interviews. Two of the jobs did not hire me because of my background check and the other because of my credit report. So what was the excuse for the other 4,007 employers. So I decided to look at my resume and see what was really going on and the strangest thing happened. I noticed that all of the employers I had worked for over the years and that was listed on my resume were companies that had been closed. ALL OF THEM, except one which was the Department of Health. If they wanted a business reference how was it possible to get anyone if they were all closed. Eagle Title & Abstract, closed for title fraud, Customer Care Plus, closed for scamming customers, Sweet Bay Supermarket, bought out by Walmart, Mortgage Investors, closed for scamming people, Universal Health Care, closed for medicare fraud. Another thing that puzzled me was they had all shout down for similar things expect SweetBay. Lord, am I cursed and what does this say about my work ethic. Why do I keep attracting myself to this situation. Then it hit me, I had become a product of the environment in a negative way not only in my personal life, but also in business as well. Why was this not apparent to me early on. 

Everything that I have talk about only says one thing to me: acquired experience. No one can take it, no one can change it, and no one can relieve those moments physically. I could be sour about it all.I have been sour about it all. And it has gotten me no where. By no fault of our own, my mother and I still reside in the home where my brother was murdered. I actually sleep in his room which is where he was murdered at his back door. People ask me am I scared to live in that room and I always reply “why would I be scared”? They might come back for you, you might see his ghost, or you might here him calling your name at night! Trust me, one of my biggest goals of the moment is getting my mom out of this house. With her multiple health problems and her broken heart, she has managed to not only stop drinking, but also find hope within herself to keep living for her other two kids. So I think it is only right to live for her as well.

Campaign Be Heard was inspired by all the experiences read above. It is about showing the world who you really are outside of all the many experiences that you gather in life. It is about not letting society or anyone label you by not offering you the job, and not letting you express the artistic membrane that drives the soul behind your physical self. What do I bring to the table you say? Natural born listener, which generates great coaching, which generates great leadership, which generates great relationships. I have so many areas that I would like to work in that the only way to do that is to bring “relative” and “relevant” information to this page. Unseen talent, political discussions, what its like living in the hood, what it takes to leave, habits and addictions, positive emotional intelligence, and what needs to be done to close the gap between living a life you have to live, and one that you want to live. Ultimately, I would like the name Campaign Be Heard to be known as one of the solutions to making opportunities available to people who may not have had the first chance. In my attempt to better the world one voice at a time, I have a goal to raise $1 million dollars just from being heard. I also have a goal to acquire these things in order for this campaign to grow to its peak:

Goal #1- A fully equiped office space with at least three office suits, a reception area, and a meeting room

Goal#2- Support from volunteers to develop training and development models

Goal#3- Salary for a staff of seven for a two years time including myself.

Goal#4 Research funds to interview unemployed citizens and learn what qualities and traits may be similar in people who have trouble finding employment, and success in life. 

I have the skill, I have the drive, I will be heard. With your help, we can be heard together. 

Contacts

John Dare

7275659933

campaignbeheard@gmail.com

 

 

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